Why Decluttering Triggers Big Emotions for ADHD Women
- Allison Converse
- Dec 28, 2025
- 3 min read
If you’ve ever looked around your house and felt that wave of frustration, guilt, or overwhelm…you're not alone. For ADHD brains, mess and chaos aren’t just visual... they’re emotional. The good news? There are small, doable ways to feel more in control again.
In this episode of The Gentle Reset, I’m sharing why decluttering can feel so emotional, especially for ADHD women. You’ll hear how to navigate the guilt, overwhelm, and big feelings that often show up when you're trying to let go, plus what to do with those unused organizing bins that didn’t quite work out.
Why It’s Not Just About the Stuff
ADHD brains feel deeply. Those big emotions, whether it’s stress, shame, or sadness, can make even small tasks feel overwhelming.
At home, that might show up as:
Guilt about items you bought and never used
Sentimental feelings tied to things you’re not ready to let go of
The heaviness of knowing where to start... and freezing instead
Research shows that physical clutter can increase your stress hormone, cortisol, which means your space really can impact your emotional energy. And when your space feels out of control, it can hit harder if you're also navigating anxiety or depression.
When big emotions show up, meet them with understanding instead of pressure. A few kind words to yourself can shift the moment from spiraling to centered.
Try telling yourself:
“I don’t have to do it all right now.”
“I can pause without quitting.”
“Mess doesn’t mean failure.”
Write down a few encouraging reminders and stick them near your sink, nightstand, or desk.
You’re not trying to get rid of the emotion, just giving it space to settle so you can move forward with a little more ease.
What I Tell Clients When the Emotions Hit Mid-Declutter
Big feelings tend to pop up when we start sorting during a decluttering project. You pick up something from a past season of life or someone you’ve lost, and suddenly you’re flooded with emotion.
Your brain might say things like:
“What if I need this again someday?”
“It feels wrong to let this go.”
When that happens, the goal isn't to push through the emotion. Instead, pause, take a breath, or step away and give yourself permission to come back later.
If it feels too hard to decide right now, create a small memory box or keepsake bin. Contain what matters without forcing big decisions in one sitting. This removes pressure while still honoring what’s important.
What to Do with All Those Unused Bins
Now let’s talk about something a little lighter… but still frustrating: the pile of empty organizing bins you bought with the best intentions.
Maybe they didn’t fit.
Maybe you bought too many.
Maybe they became part of the clutter.
I’ve been there!
Early on, I thought the “right” bins would magically fix everything. But real change didn’t come from buying more... it came from using what I already had in smarter ways.
Now I reuse bins all over the house:
A cleaning caddy now holds winter gear
A pantry bin got moved to the bathroom
A drawer divider lives in the kids’ craft cart
✨ You don’t have to start from scratch to make your home work better.
If you’re sitting on a pile of unused containers and want help making them work,
Shop My Brain was made for you. It’s 24 hours of private support to organize one space that fits your style, budget, and life.
Key Takeaways
Emotional zones deserve smaller steps and extra grace
Encouraging self-talk can shift you from overwhelmed to centered
You’re allowed to go slow, feel big feelings, and ask for support
Let’s Stay Connected
🌐 Visit the Website – Learn more about how I can support you in your home
📸 Follow on Instagram – Real-life encouragement and ADHD-friendly tips
💌 Join the Seasonal Reset Waitlist – Be first to know when support options reopen
Keep Reading?
If this post resonated with you, you might also like Overcoming Shame Around a Messy Home. It goes deeper into letting go of self‑blame and creating a home that supports you with more compassion and ease.
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